Sometimes i wonder why i write in this. Seems so self indulgent to wax lyrical about myself and my life. I read other peoples blogs and smile at the insight they offer, even if its about something utterly meaningless, and then i feel silly i haven't written something equally as smile-worthy. Then again, maybe i just like other peoples blogs because they're not mine.

The days grow shorter when you sleep as much as i have been. In truth i know its because i've been trying to ignore some things that are bothering me. I dont know exactly what they are, but i do feel them pressing on the back of my eyes from time to time, making me teary. I saw a counsellor the other day, out of obligation, and told her...well, everything. It was pretty intense, talking about all that stuff, trying not to take it all too seriously. I didn't just talk about the fam, i talked about everything, matt, what happened last year, uni, work, and anything that came to me. It did absolutely nothing for me, just reminded me of things i'd repressed and sent me not-so-merrily on my way. Still, i promised i'd try it, for other peoples sake if not my own.

I know i sound subdued and melancholy at the moment, but thats misleading. I'm still happy. I love these walls so much it makes me smile as i wander round my house, i lie in bed and look at my roof and almost burst with how peaceful it is. We have a new housemate, the winning contestant, who i knew was right from the first moment i spoke to him on the phone. THere was something gentle about his voice, intelligent, interested, switched on. And then we met him. Jesus. Thats really the only problem, just how good looking he is. Its distracting. But he has amazing taste in music and is easy to talk to about everything. His presence will invariably affect the balance of the house, but that was presumed from the moment sar moved out. I miss her already. But yes, Dave, who will turn into a hideously unrealisable crush as we make eyes across the lounge room and know we cant have eachother. Damn it. He put his hand on my waist the other night around the fire and when i pulled away my eyes told him it was against the rules. Its going to be a tough one, because i like him a fair bit. Oh wells, its for the good of this place that i love so much.

Not much is news to be honest. Breece left today for a few months, and warfey leaves tonight. Zed leaves on the 5th leaving me, ian and dave. Until we go to qld. Its going to be quiet, really quiet. I dont know if thats a bad thing though.

Still unemployed but not looking to change that just yet. Hungry often, broke always but it doesn't phase me too much. All about being a student. Uni for the semester was...unsucessful. Failed one, maybe two subjects but did so gracefully - by not handing in the work. It was suprisingly uplifting. No, nothing to report. Just been partying hard, playing my guitar, writing, reading, planning my holiday, listening to my 43 new CDs, lounging and chilling with friends. Its a good life.

Further, i'm off to meet our dealer in a trashy topless bar in the city. hey, i'm a classy gal...

Two things:

1. STOP READING THIS. I DONT KNOW HOW TO MAKE IT ANY CLEARER. I HAVE A COUNTER. I HAVE MUCH PROOF THAT YOU'VE BEEN READING THIS FROM YOUR COMPUTER. ITS NOT COOL. I'M NOT HAPPY. PLEASE STOP. THANKYOU.

2. WE'RE GOING TO QUEENSLAND TOMORROW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THAT IS ALL